It always intrigues me when I begin to teach a class or write a new curriculum and I suddenly find myself walking through it.
Behind every inspiring teaching, there is a teacher that is on the journey with you.
The next three months as I dive into emotional wellness class. I find myself weeping. Sobbing. The term, "HOT mess" seems quite fitting. For days. Awkward and uncomfortable dialogue with the Lord.
For a person gifted with discernment, prophetic, and deeply rooted empathy... a time like this, is filled with every level of emotion. Weird ones. This is a strange time. A strange time calls for strange emotions. I have to ask, what is this about God? Crying out to God this last week, day and night. Angry. Broken.
We are made in His image, that includes the emotions we were given.
God reminds me that it is not always pretty smelling roses. Even roses have thorns. God can and will call you to be broken, to train you for things to come.
When God calls you into a place, that place becomes a training ground. When you train for something you have never done before, you will fail many more times before you succeed.
I have been called in many ways over the years, to be positive, stand strong, pray without ceasing, faithful, trusting, and full of hope. Now the time has come for me to be in a place of brokenness.
What happens when your emotions become a liability?
They get away from you. You speak and act irrationally.
What happens when you are in training and it is so socially unacceptable to be emotional? The stigma is real people!
Emotions can be many things. Foolish, fear driven, irrational, filled with sin. What they are NOT is the enemy. And, they are NOT wrong.
I was born superiorly emotional. God gave me an extra dose for the purpose of my calling. They weren't always protected as a child. In fact, they were often mocked rather than encouraged or empowered. Now as an adult, I have to turn back and heal those wounds to polish the gift.
How do we do that in a time when it has become extremely socially unacceptable to express them. The enemy has waged war on God's gifts to us. Emotions are not the problem at all, it is the war against the freedom to express and how we respond.
We are not protective of the emotions in others that were made in God's image. We are also not being responsible for our responses. They way to work on both of these is by partnering with Holy Spirit in your emotions AND your responses to them. Everyone is accountable for their participation in protecting the emotions given to us.
Romans 12:15 says, rejoice with those who rejoice, WEEP with those who WEEP.
Several times it talks about anger. Never does it say be without anger, always it says to slow it and do not sin in it.
My favorite verse is Matthew 5:4, Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Jesus taught us on the hill what it would be like to walk it out in His name. He says we would have all different feelings, all different actions would come against us, but most of all, he said we would be blessed because of it.
Walking out the kingdom on earth is emotional. It is a part of a frontline tactic. When we leave to fight the battle we are equipped with all the different emotions. What happens if one of our people becomes wounded in battle? We must stand together and submit them to the Lord, TOGETHER.
The enemy has tried to confuse us by determining what emotions should look like. Men are weak when they cry and women are weak in anger. If women cry they are dramatic and unruly and if men get angry they are uncontrolled and need management. All of these insist that we tuck it all away and live in oppression.
I haven't felt safe in a long time. To go on the frontline with my emotions has been exhausting. I have been beaten down. I have come crawling and wounded to people and they have left me for dead with their words and actions. Daggers thrown at me, "you're crazy", "crybaby", "get over it", it isn't about you".
There is only one enemy and it is not each other. Turning against each other weakens us all. In fact, in 1 Corinthians 12, it tells us that if one of our body parts are weak, we need to pay attention to it as a priority. A wounded body cannot work together. Then it goes on to describe what it takes to have a working body in chapter 13. Love is patient, it is kind. Love is generous. Love is humble. Love is respectful. It is gentle and consistent and provides a safe place. Love believes in others. Love NEVER GIVES UP. Love surpasses all things. Love is the greatest emotion because it drives out fear.
I know God is there. I know He is my great healer. He is all I need. He has also sent us to be there with each other. To partner and act in His love. Safely.
I am going to be walking through these emotions each week on Monday mornings. Suiting up our armor to fight the mighty battle we have been called to. Rising up in revival, healed. If you want to join me, please message me.